


Erase Me

by LoweFantasy



Category: Yu-Gi-Oh!
Genre: Abuse of Authority, Alternate Universe - Student/Teacher, Anxiety Disorder, Cross-Posted on FanFiction.Net, F/M, Fanfiction, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Inspired by Music, Musical References, Panic Attacks, Poetry, Romance, Social Anxiety, Teacher-Student Relationship, Teen Romance
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-10-17
Updated: 2016-01-01
Packaged: 2018-04-26 20:21:06
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Rape/Non-Con, Underage
Chapters: 10
Words: 17,519
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5019085
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LoweFantasy/pseuds/LoweFantasy
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Yugi is painfully shy. But when a certain choir teacher picks out her voice among the rest, he makes it his personal mission to help her overcome her social anxiety so she can share her talent with others. But before that there were the poems from a secret lover, who knows all too well of how inappropriate a relationship between the two of them would be. Can be read without knowing the fandom.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Come No Closer, Kindness

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> An intro to two terrifying teachers, a terrified Yugi, and a not-so terrified Joey.

It started with the poem.  
  
                “ _Come no closer, kindness._  
 _I cannot feel your truth_  
 _without trembling_  
 _for its rarity._  
 _And should we dare to touch_  
 _I’m certain_  
 _I would break you,_  
 _and that cannot be."_  
  
        Joey read it over Yugi’s shoulder the moment her shorter friend had pulled it out of her locker, along with the bright red rose.  
        “What kinda love poem is that? If it weren’t for this rose I wouldn’ e’n be able to tell.”  
        Yugi, however, thought it was sweet. Sentimental, even, and blushed. Then again, Yugi blushed very easily.  
        For the next minute Joey and Yugi took turns examining the curly cursive to see if they recognized the handwriting. Soon, however, Yugi had to put her rose back in her locker and head off to class.  
        “For your sake, I hope they ain’t butt ugly.”  
        “Even if they were,” said Yugi. “I’d like to get to know them.”  
        “You’re too nice, and I don’t mean that in a good way. You’ll keep me up to date, right?”  
        “Always do.”  
  
(*&*%*(&)(*))%$^%  
  
        Tea caught up to her in choir. Though Yugi was a soprano and Tea was an alto, their sections stood close enough that the two could stand next to each other and whisper little comments. Unfortunately, since Yugi was, by far, the tiniest person in class, she was on the front row, meaning Tea only got a few words in about Yugi’s secret admirer (which she heard about from Joey when she had met her after Biology), before Mr. Atem leveled his famous blood curdling glare on them. Though never cruel, that didn’t stop the straight backed music teacher from scaring the crap out of any student that dare chit-chat in his class. They had far too little time to learn their music to waste it on talking, he’d say.  
        Thus, Yugi shriveled up in submissive horror. Tea imitated him, though Yugi could tell she was inwardly melting.  
        “How can someone look so hot and scary at the same time?” she murmured somewhere between steps of ‘fa tra la la sah’ and lip buzzes.  
        And, thus, Tea forgot about to ask Yugi about the details.  
        Yugi let out a quiet sigh of relief. She didn’t know if she was quite ready for the hyperactivity Tea was sure to inject into the subject. It was just a poem. And, secretly, Yugi suspected it was probably a prank, though she knew her friends would vehemently deny it should she tell them.  
After all, Yugi had never had a secret admirer, but she had had plenty of bullies.  
        When the bell rang, Yugi prepared herself for Tea’s whispered speculations of how many times Mr. Atem must have looked at her or picked her voice out for fine tuning (‘if he loves me he won’t be able to do anything about it, being a teacher and all. Oh! I could scream!’), but instead of getting Tea, Yugi turned around to see Mr. Atem himself, arms folded, and ever formidable. His sharp red eyes didn’t help, and for a horrible breath Yugi thought she might pee. Why dear Lord did this man wear red contacts? Because they had to be contacts. Wasn’t his wild rock star hair scary enough? Some speculated he’d rather be working for Kiss rather than a high school music teacher, and the sharp glares supported this theory.  
        “Yugi, can I have a quick word with you?”  
        Yugi nodded. Oh no, please let her not be in trouble. She could just handle choir with him, forget being alone in the same room with him.  
        Nevertheless, she followed him into the small office separated from the rest of the music room by a glass and metal door. Yugi did her best not to stick her foot in the door as it hissed shut.  
        Mr. Atem turned to her and leaned against his desk. It was only then that Yugi realized his tie wasn’t black, but a deep maroon. Like dried blood.  
        Mr. Atem smiled, which softened his sharp features just barely. “No need to look so frightened. You’re not in trouble. Quite the opposite. I think you’ve been doing well, or, your singing has. Have you ever had voice lessons? I can’t see you never considering them, from what I know of you.”  
        That easy blush tickled the top of Yugi’s nose and she looked down at her feet, as she was often prone to do. Tea and Joey had made it their life goal to stop that bad habit of hers.  
        “No, sir.”  
        “Why not? Never had the money?”  
        Yugi tucked the toes of her Converse together. “No. I did sort of try once.”  
        “Try?”  
        “Got, um…I just didn’t feel like it.” Yugi didn’t have to mention that the moment the voice teacher had asked her to open her mouth she had burst into terrified tears. She was pathetic enough staring at her toes like some autistic socially troubled dweeb without him knowing that too.  
        “Any way I can help you feel like it now? I’d be willing to give you some voice lessons for extra credit after school. With your grandfather’s permission, of course.”  
        This shocked Yugi’s gaze up to the teacher’s face, but she quickly dropped it down to the dry-blood tie.  
        “Am I that bad?” she squeaked.  
        Mr. Atem laughed at this, a deep, throaty chuckle that the students didn’t hear very often. Yugi couldn’t help but smile when she imagined what Tea would do if she was here, alone, with that laugh. Probably faint.  
        “Are you serious? Yugi, your voice is phenomenal, and I can always pick you out from the soprano section, without fail. I want to see where you can go with it. If I just left you to vanish back into the student body, I’d regret it for the rest of my life. What do you say?”  
        Yugi fidgeted. She already knew her answer. If she would cry in front of a kind, fat little old lady, there was no telling what might happen if she was asked to open her mouth for Mr. Halloween-Rock-Star-Atem.  
        But Mr. Atem must have predicted her thoughts, for he said, before she could even breathe, “Of course I’d let you bring your friend Tea with you, if you like. I know it can be intimidating to sing for one person, especially someone you know is judging you.”  
        That stopped Yugi’s denial flat. If Yugi could give Tea the chance to spend quality time with Atem after school, just her and him (practically, even if Yugi was there)…  
        And if Yugi wasn’t alone…she really did like to sing. She loved it, even, and what he was offering was free, professional voice lessons, which, as she knew from experience, weren’t cheap.  
        So with that, Yugi and Mr. Atem made plans and Yugi was sent home with a permission slip for her mother to sign.  
  
(@*&%$%^#(*@  
  
        Yugi gave Tea her permission slip at the beginning of English class, which was the last period for the day. After Yugi’s quick explanation, Tea screamed so loudly, several students jumped and cried out.  
        “Oh my GOD!”  
        Yugi had to jump to slap her hands over her much taller friend. Everyone was staring.  
        “Keep it down! You’re not the only one who likes him, remember?” Yugi hissed as loud as she dared.  
        Tea tore off her hand, beaming. “So? Oh my—EEK! I’ve never dreamed—oh ‘lanta, just wait till Mai hears about this she is going to KILL me!”  
        She went on like that all the way up till Mr. Keith strutted in with his usual too-tight wrestling T-shirt and American bandana. Anyone who saw him wouldn’t have believed he was an English teacher. Though he was the school’s wrestling coach, wrestling and Shakespeare didn’t exactly go hand in hand.  
        “Alright, twerps, you better have last week’s Othello essays ready to roll or it’s F bombs on your sorry behinds.”  
        The class groaned. That was another thing. Hardly anyone liked him. As the symphony of rustling paper quieted down, Mr. Keith (or ‘the Asshole Bandit’ as Joey liked to call him), leveled a none-too-kind smile on tiny Yugi, who shrunk in her seat. He loved picking on her, probably because, without fail, Yugi would rise pitch white and sit down as red as a tomato.  
        “You first, shrimp. Let’s hear your sorry excuse for a thesis statement. And you’ll be glad to know I have a barf bag right here, ‘case you need it.” Mr. Keith waved a brown paper doggybag he’d kept on his desk since that first time he had had Yugi read outloud. Any humane teacher would have let Yugi off the hook with that, or at least apologized. Keith just smirked wider with glee.  
        Clenching her mouth tight, Yugi took a deep breath through her nose and stood on shaking knees, feeling nauseous despite the burning determination to not give in.  
        As she endured several booms of ‘louder!’ that never failed to make her flinch, Yugi couldn’t help but remember the words of the poem and wonder if, just maybe, it wasn’t a prank at all. The poems soft words had been so unlike the tortures of the roaring English teacher.  
         _Come no closer, kindness._  
 


	2. Quiet Now

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Yugi finds herself all alone during her lesson with Mr. Atem.

                “ _Quiet, now._  
 _The softness of your eyes_  
 _only open_  
 _to unfiltered sunlight,_  
 _and tremble to any cloud_  
 _of storm._  
 _But I’ll kiss_  
 _every shard of amethyst_  
 _the thunder may break from them.”_  
  
        Yugi rubbed her thumb across the cursive, as though she could feel the fingers of the writer through them. She couldn’t help but smile. Even if it were a horrible prank, she could believe it for now, couldn’t she?  
        Joey, however, took out the red rose from Yugi’s locker with a frown.  
        “I don’t know why, but I gotta bad feel’n ‘bout this guy.”  
        “You got a bad feeling about every guy.” Which, knowing Joey’s history with gangs and her abusive drunk of a father, wasn’t surprising.  
        “Someone’s gotta. If it weren’ for me, you’d go out with the first fellow who asked, even if he had ‘Yay Date Rape’ on his forehead.”  
        “I’d like to think I’m not that stupid.”  
        “Naïve, Yug. If you ever call yourself stupid I’m punch’n your lights out, best friend or not, especially after beat’n me at Martian Rails by $2,500 last night. I’m still pissed off at you for that.”  
        What she didn’t know was that it was actually $5,500, but Yugi had kindly ignored that and told her friend the lesser number. She had to, otherwise Joey might not play another game with her, and then where would she be? Tea wouldn’t anymore, that was for sure—even if Yugi had just blessed her with an entire week of personal voice lessons with Mr. Atem.  
        Come English class, however, Yugi was presented with a far bigger problem than Mr. Keith’s torment when Tea ran out of the classroom and didn’t come back. She sent Yugi a text saying she had to go home sick, and Yugi didn’t ask for details. Joey texted back that it was probably a bad case of the runs, followed with a little cat-lipped smiley.  
        This left Yugi to walk into the empty choir room on her own, her hands clammy and her mouth dry, and no second singer to hide behind. Mr. Atem waited at the baby grand as usual with his hands picking out chords.  
        “Where’s Tea?” he asked, stopping mid G-Major scale.  
        Yugi mumbled something that she hoped sounded enough like ‘she’s sick’ to make sense, but sounded scrambled even to her. Mr. Atem looked concerned, but then smiled.  
        “I’m proud of you for coming anyways. It’s okay if you’d rather go home.”  
        But Yugi didn’t move. For some reason, she kept thinking of the doggie bag on Mr. Keith’s desk, and then the lines of the poem she had received that morning.  _Quiet, now…but I’ll kiss every shard…_  
        She looked down at her sweaty hands. The sight of them almost made her cry. Even as she thought of her own nervousness and how awful it felt to always have her stomach twisting up or her face getting hot at the smallest provocation, she could feel her eyes burn.  
        No, no, she couldn’t cry. She hadn’t even done anything yet.  
        She heard a squeak of Mr. Atem’s leather boots. He always wore the same leather boots, no matter if he wore jeans, slacks, or shorts. “Yugi, is everything okay?”  
        No, everything wasn’t okay.  
        The moment Mr. Atem made a move to stand up, Yugi knew she would flee, and there would be nothing to stop her. She was just too scared, scared of everything, and it was so pathetic. It was already bad enough that she was small as a mouse, forget being as timid as one.  
        But Mr. Atem didn’t stand up. Rather, he spoke in a gentle voice, barely more than a whisper.  
        “I won’t laugh.”  
        And before Yugi could stop herself, she blurted, “I hate me.”  
        “Yugi…”  
        “I-I-I hate how s-shy—I’m f-freaking terrified of everyone, it’s…it’s so stupid, it’s so dumb, I’m so pathetic. I really hate me.”  
        And there it was. The tears. Oh God, she’d never live this down. She should run right then, right there, and she even turned to do so—  
        But a warm hand on her wrist stopped her. Just as quickly as it appeared there, it vanished, as though her skin burned him. She dared to look up past her blond bangs.  
        Mr. Atem wasn’t laughing. Rather, the sharpness that so intimidated all his students had softened with a look Yugi couldn’t decipher; something akin to pain.  
        It flashed away as soon as Yugi noticed it.  
        “I’m not going to tell you how silly you are to hate someone like yourself,” he said, still at that low volume as though he were talking to a frightened deer. “But I can say I can help you work on it. You don’t have to be so shy if you don’t want to be.”  
        Yugi wrinkled her nose in disgust, then sniffed and wiped her eyes roughly. “I don’t know, I’ve never heard of a case as bad as mine.”  
        “How about we make a bet, then? If I can’t help you overcome your shyness by the end of the year, I’ll pay you $500.”  
        Yugi’s eyes widened. “What?”  
       “Just think of all the games you could get with $500. You do like games, don’t you? I saw you and one of your friends playing in the cafeteria once. Duel Monsters, right?”  
        Despite all her inhibitions and the thousands of voices screaming at her not to, Yugi’s brain had already started calculating how many packets of Duel Monsters cards she could get with that money. Heck, she could buy a whole box, even, maybe several. She could even pay for a day out with Joey to the arcade, where they could do any game they want until the arcade closed.  
        Her mouth didn’t feel so dry anymore.  
        Mr. Atem held out his hand. “Well?”  
        Yugi gulped, then clasped it. His palm was just as warm as it had been before, and the knuckles of his fingers didn’t hurt hers when he squeezed them lightly in a shake, as though they were carved to hold tiny hands like hers.  
        “Deal.”  
        “Great!” He returned to normal volume, and Yugi flinched. “In that case, I’ll inform miss Tea that her lessons with me are concluded. From now on, it will be just you and me.”  
        Yugi blanched. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I still update at least once a week on Wednesday, sometimes more! So stay tuned!


	3. Fate, Please

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Yugi get's expectantly beat on by a nameless wrestler, but is rescued by a certain teacher.

Yugi could sort of see how stage fright and shyness were connected, but she didn't fully trust that the techniques used to conquer one would pass on to the other. After three lessons, all of which ended with Yugi red faced, teary eyed, and barely getting out a single note at a time (not to mention starting to think Mr. Atem wanted to destroy her rather than help), she finally managed to squeak out the warm ups. Mr. Atem rewarded her with a strawberry lollipop, which she was currently licking when a boy dressed in wrestling spandex burst out from a door in front of her and fell face first onto the linoleum. The familiar horn of Mr. Keith's bellowing followed him out the door before it hissed closed.

Yugi scrambled to help him up, but before she could figure out what was safe to touch on the half-naked, sweaty boy, he had gotten to his feet and had a hand to his scraped elbow. His hair had been gelled into a single, thick spike in front of his head, like some strange idea of a pompadour, and despite the sweat dripping from his chin it didn't seem in the least affected by his exercise.

He glared at Yugi and her lollipop.

"What're you looking at?"

"Nothing!" she squeaked.

"Like hell!" His face had been flushed red, but was steadily leaning towards purple. "You were listening, weren't you?"

"No!" Did he mean the yelling? "I mean, I heard him yell, but I was just passing by—"

His open palm connected with her cheek. The force threw her off her feet and sent the lollipop flying, where it shattered against a wall of lockers.

Before she could do little more than register the hot pain which had replaced the right side of her face, the boy grabbed the front of her shirt and flung her against the lockers. She gave a cry of pain as her backbone and skull slapped against them. Stars burst in front of her eyes.

"Little bitch! Teach you to listen at doors!"

"I-I-I was just—"

A foot connected with her stomach. She coughed, which turned to a retch. On no, she was going to puke. Please let her not puke. God, it hurt so much.

She could just make out the boy's shoe through a film of tears pulling back for another blow when a roar ripped through the hallway like thunder.

"WHAT THE HELL DO YOU THINK YOU'RE DOING, BRAT!?"

The wrestler had to work through the haze of his rage to register what was happening. By then, Mr. Atem had already crossed the hall, grabbed the front of his spandex uniform, and flung him against the lockers.

In that moment he lived up to every image his sharp features and blood red eyes hinted at. He had his teeth bared when he pushed the kid up till his toes barely touched the floor, despite being almost a head shorter. He was strong.

"You better turn tail and never come back before I have you  _expelled_  for what you just did!"

The boy grunted, flashing his teeth back. "Stupid girl had it—"

_Slam!_  The kid grunted from the force, but Mr. Atem had come in close and personal, snarling into the other's face. "What kind of idiot guy beats up a girl?! Let alone one half his size!?"

"Hell! Fine! Just let me go, you freak!"

And he did. Barely sparing the choir teacher a glance, the wrestler stumbled off towards the locker rooms, cursing.

In an instant Mr. Atem switched from demonic to soft voice teacher once more as he crouched down.

"Where does it hurt?"

"I-I'm fine," she said. And she was. It hurt like the dickens and she still hadn't managed to get a full breath, but she didn't feel like she was going to puke anymore. She hoped he didn't say anything about the lollipop. "I'll have some gnarly bruises to show off to Joey in the morning, heh!"

He helped her to her feet and steadied her as she hugged her middle. As she struggled to catch her breath, he gently pulled her face toward him to examine the red mark where the boy's hand had hit. Something twitched in his expression, and his lips thinned.

"Come on, I'll get you a cold rag. It should help with the swelling."

Yugi could feel herself heating up in embarrassment. "No, it's okay, I'm fine, really. I may look small but I'm tough." Also true. It wasn't like this was new to her. Bully magnet number one, right here, girl or no.

"'Course you are, but I'd rather not send you home to your parents without showing some sign of trying to help, and I got some ibuprofen too."

And since Yugi was a pro at choosing which fights to fight, she allowed Mr. Atem to pull her back to his office, despite the way that terrifying face of his had been towards the wrestler.

The shards of the strawberry lollipop glittered after them in the afternoon sun.

In his office he pulled out an ice pack ("I keep it for migranes—symptom of being a music teacher.") and gave it to her to press against her face. He then popped some familiar red ibuprofen into her hand with a bottle of water and offered to walk her to the front door of the school.

"Not that it matters, but why did that boy attack you?" he asked as they passed the front office.

"He thought I overheard something between him and Mr. Keith," she shrugged. "I kind of don't blame him. Knowing Mr. Keith, it was bound to be humiliating."

"What do you mean?"

Yugi glanced at him with her one uncovered eye, then looked down shyly. "I…I shouldn't speak badly about a teacher. This is your first year, right?"

Mr. Atem nodded and Yugi gave a quiet 'ah.' When she didn't continue after that, Mr. Atem pushed her for her opinion as he opened the school's front doors for her.

"Well," she hesitated, grasping her elbow. "I-I don't dislike him or anything, but, um, one time he called on me and class and, you know, I sort of…got so nervous I threw up."

"Wait, that was you?"

Now her blush painted everything from her shoulders up with hot flame. Was she that infamous?

At the look on her face, he raised his hands in defense. "There was nothing about you, I just heard him telling some teachers about a girl who threw up in his class out of nerves once, and so every time she speaks he keeps a barf bag on hand. Seemed sort of considerate, maybe."

Yugi gave a pained grimace through her hot face. "Yeah, it would be. But he sort of, um, calls on me before everyone else, every day, and then makes sure to wave it around. I guess he's trying to help me get over it, I mean, I'm still really sorry for throwing up and grossing everyone out but…Mr. Atem?"

His name came out of her timidly as the ugly look from before threatened to reappear. It was the wrestling boy all over again, and she became instantly alarmed as to what the teacher would do.

"Please, Mr. Atem, it's nothing bad! I'm sure if it was anyone else but me they'd be fine, I'm just, you know, shy."

"That's bullying, no matter who you are." He said flatly, but to Yugi's relief his expression softened. "I'm sorry, have I scared you? I've been told I can be rather intimidating at times."

"No! Not at all!" Lie. Her voice always squeaked too high when she lied.

But he seemed to take it and he waved her farewell.

Yugi's mother was off to work, as usual, so it was her grandpa that fussed over her developing bruises. After insisting for the uptenth time that it was handled, and that a teacher had broke in this time, Grandpa satisfied himself by pushing a mug of her favorite hot cocoa into her hands and situating her on the couch amidst a nest of poofy quilts. There they watched an old black and white classic until Yugi's insides finally stopped shaking.

Sometimes she reminded herself of a Chihuahua. Tiny, trembling, bug-eyed-probably annoying too.

She really did hate herself.

! #$^%&*^%$# $%

Joey descended on her like a charging bull the moment she caught sight of Yugi's half purple face.

"Who the hell did this? And don't you dare try to defend them, I'm going to rip out their hair and dig out their eyes with my thumb!"

"Joey! Stop! It's fine!"

"Why didn't ya call me? You promised!"

"If you'd just calm down and listen to me I can explain."

"Don't try the fell off my bed and onto my dresser excuse, just give me names."

"I don't know his name—"

"Him?! Aw hell, that's low! Yug, you're going to point him out so I can chop his balls off—"

"Do you always bark so much this early in the morning, Wheeler?"

Instant Joey derailment. Coming up from the back doors that Joey had just entered was none other than Seto Kaiba, tall, handsome, insanely rich (no one knew why he came to a public school), rude, and Joey's arch nemesis. Yugi would have smiled, since their battles were often amusing, if it wasn't for Joey's already irate mood.

"Not now, moneybags, I'm busy."

"Chopping off someone's balls? How very ladylike. Though I'd think a mongrel like you would chew them off. Pretty image we got there."

Joey whirled on him, red to the tips of her shaggy, gold blond hair. Yugi almost expected steam to start pouring out from her ears like a volcano. There was nothing she hated more than perverted comments on her own sex. From day one she hated being a girl, which was why Yugi and her made such good friends, in a way. Yugi hated her shyness, Joey hated her sex.

"I got enough fists for both of ya, so ya better shut your yap before you lose some teeth!"

"Or what? You might chew my balls off too? I think I like this idea—"

"Bastard!" She made a swing, and, per usual, Seto simply stepped to the side, smirking.

And also as per usual, Seto's uncanny luck to summon a teacher the moment Joey started throwing fists kicked into gear.

This time, it was Mr. Atem.

Yugi could only be amazed that Mr. Atem's famous ice-inducing glare worked even on the formidable Seto Kaiba, who backed down just as quickly as Joey.

"While your flirting is amusing—" he started.

Joey gagged. " _Flirting?"_

"—I'm in no mood to play. Kaiba, keep up provoking Josephine and I'll write you up for sexual harassment. Josephine, get violent and I'll see you're suspended."

And then his grumpy gaze fell on Yugi, who stiffened. He blinked, softened just a bit, and nodded.

"See you in choir, Yugi?"

"Yes, Mr. Atem."

Joey glared at both teacher and boy as they walked away, growling in her throat.

"Well ain't this great? Not even eight and I already want to blow up this damn hellhole."

Though she liked Joey's bad moods as much as the next person, she took the opportunity of Joey's distraction to quickly explain what had happened the day before. She finished as they reached their lockers, and Yugi had to focus on twisting in her combination.

"You say Mr. Atem threw the kid?" Joey gave a low whistle. "Wish I'd seen it."

"I wish I hadn't. He was scary." The door popped open and a slip of paper fell out. Yugi recognized the curl of cursive through the white paper and picked it up. Instantly Joey was behind her, chin over her shoulder, bad mood forgotten. Yugi gave her friend a fond smile and unfolded this week's poem.

_"Fate, please,_

_let me wrap her in silk,_

_wash away her tears_

_with morning dew._

_Let nothing harsh_

_touch such delicately_

_woven lace_

_as my little one's soul._

_But I'm not deceived._

_Even spindly spider's web_

_can catch a bullet_

_better than steel."_

Joey chortled. "I like this one. I think he's finally seeing who you really are."

"What do you mean?"

"That you ain't some delicate thing. You're strong, Yug. Stronger than you know."

Yugi snorted. "You sound like some cheesy motivational poster."

"Do ya think I'd lie to you?"

"Tell me that when I don't barf in front of my English class and I might believe you. Until then, thanks for the sentiment." And before Joey could continue the argument, "Want to sleep over this weekend?"

As predicted, Joey was instantly distracted. There was nothing she loved more than getting out of her house and away from her father.

 


	4. Hear Yourself

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Mr. Atem proves to Yugi that she has nothing to be afraid of by recording her.

"This room is one of the bands private practice studios. I've had to reserve it, so we better get through our warm ups quick."

The room in question was off to the side of the tiny hallway that connected the choir room to the band and orchestra room. It was tiny, about the size of Yugi's bathroom at home, and only had two music stands, the same industrial carpet, and walls covered in sound proofing foam. She found she kind of like the place. It seemed like a comfy nook to hole up in whenever you wanted to be alone.

Mr. Atem pushed her squeaking through the warm ups too quickly to explain, but once he seemed satisfied that she was as loosened up as she was going to get, he slipped out a small black box from his shirt pocket and led her back to the studio.

"Alright, I'm going to leave you in the room for five minutes. I'll close the door behind me and go out into the hall, so there's no chance I will be able to hear you. I want you to sing, whatever you want, for five minutes. This will record you." He lifted up the black box, which Yugi then recognized for what it was.

She squirmed. "It won't be any different, someone will still hear—"

"No, they won't."

She paused. "They won't? But if its recording me—"

"It's recording for you. If you don't want me to hear it, I won't. The purpose of this exercise is to let you hear what you sound like, because I know you don't realize how good you are."

She looked down to her feet—stupid bad habit—as she felt her face heat up as it always did.

Mr. Atem sounded as though he were smiling at her as he continued. "Once you hear yourself, I hope it gives you the confidence you need to not be afraid to sing anymore—wherever you want, whenever you want. So, you ready? Need a drink of water before I shut you in?"

She shook her head, so Mr. Atem set up the recorder on one of the music stands, told her which button to push when she was ready, and then left.

Once the door was closed, all outside noise was shut out. She couldn't hear when Mr. Atem closed the door behind him as he went into the hallway. She couldn't even hear the hum of the A/C or the click of the classroom clock.

A sudden relief washed over her, undoing knots she hadn't noticed and drawing out breath she hadn't realized she'd been holding in. For the first time in days, maybe weeks, Yugi relaxed.

She was alone. No one would hear her. No one could see her. It was just her.

When she finally turned on the recorder, no nervous squirm twisted her gut. It was like she was home alone, singing as she cleaned. How much she loved those days always made her secretly ashamed.

When Mr. Atem came back in from the hallway, she was waiting for him in the choir room.

"Have you listened to it yet?"

She shook her head. "I…I'm sort of afraid to."

"Well I'm glad you waited anyways, I wanted you to listen on some high-def headphones."

Ah. Yes. There was the familiar dread. "Mr. Atem—"

"Don't worry, Yugi. Trust me."

So she clenched her knees together beneath her skirt and let Mr. Atem slip the headphones over her ears.

"You have the most interesting hair," he said as he plugged the jack into the recorder.

"I've always liked bright colors. When I dye parts of my hair it somehow makes me feel like I'm more daring than I actually am." She couldn't help but giggle at that as she fingered her blond bangs and strands of her purple tipped, long black hair. "I'm silly, aren't I?"

"Not any more silly than I am. Ready?"

"No, but go ahead."

At first all she heard was quiet breathing and maybe the soft buzz of white noise. But then someone—because it couldn't be her—started to sing, and her jaw dropped. The most peculiar sensation came over her, hot like fudge, and tickling her skin. Then her eyes started to twinge.

This couldn't be her. It couldn't be.

Because the music was beautiful. Professional grade beautiful. The tone, the style, the pronunciation, the breathing—how had she managed to get it all down so well? All those years singing to herself and comparing it to the radio. The only thing that helped Yugi to believe that it really was her was the fact it was a high, sweet soprano.

She listened to the full five minutes of her singing to herself before slipping off the phones.

Mr. Atem had that tender smile on his face that took away the rock star intimidation he usually wore. In a flash of awakening, she could see it, what Tea could see. Mr. Atem was gorgeous, handsome—how had she never seen it before? And how could a man like this be working as a high school music teacher?

"Well?" he asked.

"T-this can't be me."

"Oh, trust me, it's you. Didn't quite believe it myself when I first picked you out. Took me a while, you really like to hide beneath whoever you're singing with. So," he slid down onto the baby grand piano bench and settled his fingers on the keys. "Think you can practice for real this time knowing you've got nothing to be afraid of?"

But Yugi hadn't moved. She still clung to the headphones. A part of her tried to be embarrassed by how much she was letting this get to her head, but she couldn't remember…couldn't comprehend…

Despite her best attempts not to, Yugi started to cry.

Mr. Atem's face fell. "Oh no, did I say something? Are you okay?"

"I-I'm just so relieved," she said, raising an arm to hide her face. "Oh my gosh, I can't believe how relieved I am. I'm not awful."

"Did you really think you were?"

"No, but I was always afraid that I was."

He chuckled softly. "One less thing to be afraid of in this scary world. Come here. I've waited a long time to hear you—no one to hide behind."

She was nervous as always at first. But as it fully sunk in that the angel in the recording was actually her, and she started to pick out the angel in herself, she found herself stepping forward with a confidence she had never had before. She stopped squeaking. She finally found she could breathe. And five minutes after their time was up, Yugi had sung a whole song without giving a single concern over the fact that Mr. Atem sat right next to her, hearing every note.

She waited for his suggestions once the final chord ended, but he held still. He just sat there, holding the pencil for notes in one hand and staring at the sheet music, as though trying to find his place and not finding it.

Slowly, he put down the pencil. His fingers were shaking.

"You've made remarkable progress. I'm so, so very impressed."

Yugi beamed. "No, thank you! That was amazing! I-I-I can't believe it could be so much fun to—you're such an amazing teacher, Mr. Atem!"

"Yami."

Yugi mentally stumbled. "What?"

"My name. Yami. You can call me that, if you like." And with the sound as though not wanting to go on to his next breath without explaining himself, he said, "if it makes you more comfortable to sing with a friend who is trying to help you rather than judge you, that is. Some students call me that."

Yugi frowned. She had never heard a student call him Yami before. Maybe it was some of the class clowns in the orchestra class..

"Though Mr. Atem is fine too!" he said. "Oh jeeze, I hope I'm not making you uncomfortable, am I?"

He was nervous. Worried he'd made her uncomfortable. Somehow the thought made her smile. Scary or not, he really was just like everyone else. In a way, that helped her feel a little better about her own social anxiety.

And for one of the very few times since classes started, Yugi let Mr. Atem catch her eye. He held it for a second longer than was comfortable, but dropped it as he stood.

"Better get home. Jim gets impatient."

Yugi cocked her head to the side. "Jim?"

"My cat." He straightened the music sheets and closed the piano. "Must say I prefer cats over people when it comes to living space. We're not too different in the regards that we can only take so much of the company of strangers."

"Sometimes the company of friends too," said Yugi.

"In that case, you best be off. You need all the solitude recharging time you can get, eh?" And the smile he gave her said he wasn't offended in the least.

But her mouth opened of its own accord. The words 'I wouldn't mind spending it with you' rose up to the back of her throat. She swallowed it down just in time, mortified. What was wrong with her?

"Be safe, Yugi."

"You too…Yami."

 


	5. If I Die

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Yugi and Joey discus their love lives over a game of cards.

"Woa, red flag."

Joey had her hands up in the air as though at a soccer game as she said this. She had thrown them up so quickly she almost tipped over onto Yugi's purple bed she was leaning against. Yugi frowned and tried not to catch a glimpse of the two kings and a three that Joey held in her hand. She made not winning so difficult sometimes.

"What are you freaking out about? And put down your hands already, I can see your cards."

"'Cause this teach is sound'n way too familiar for comfort. I could freak'n feel the sexual tension from here."

Yugi flushed. "There wasn't any sexual tension! He's just being a good teacher. Three nines." Yugi put the cards face down on the little pile in the middle.

"Bull shit!" said Joey, realizing a minute too late what she had just done. With a smirk, Yugi flipped over the cards, proving they were, indeed, exactly what she said they were. Joey groaned and reached to gather the cards into her already bulging hand. A pile of spare cards (so they could play BS without a third player), sat untouched on her other side.

"There isn't anything! I haven't even been able to call him by his first name again because it just feels too weird, but that doesn't mean anything."

"Fine, be in denial, I got more important things to talk to you about. Two tens."

"Like what? One eleven."

"Tea. She's been avoid'n us—well, more specifically you ever since Mr. Atem dropped her from those lessons. Two jacks."

Yugi frowned as she picked out her cards, a two and an ace. She had noticed a bit of stiffness in the way Tea greeted her in choir, but always wanted to give her friends the benefit of a doubt. She liked to believe that, if her friends had a problem with her, they'd tell her about it. They wanted her to fix it, didn't they? Wanted to stay friends?

Joey's comment, however, made something sick-like stir in her stomach.

"Two queens."

Joey didn't notice the lie and slapped down three cards. "Three kings. I'm pretty sure she's butt-hurt that Mr. Atem is keeping you all to himself—"

"Bull shit!"

"Well, he is."

"Joey, turn over your cards."

Joey did so, trying to not look too frustrated when she revealed that her third king was actually a four. As she gathered up even more cards, she said, "I have no problem if she unfriends us or whatever, but you know how she is. She's sure to raise a Disney-movie worthy drama-mama with Mai and cause all sorts o' crap."

Yugi wrinkled her nose. "Oh, come on, it's not like she's going to spread around the school that I'm having some sort of inappropriate affair with Mr. Atem just because I get voice lessons and she doesn't."

Yugi had meant it to be a joke; a huge exaggeration. At the seriousness on Joey's face, she slapped her forehead into her palm.

"Oh please."

"Hey! There's a reason I said it's a problem!"

"Two kings, and get back to the real world, Joey. Even if people like that do exist outside of  _Mean Girls_ , this is Tea we're talking about. Our friend. Not to mention she's completely in love with Mr. Atem, why would she go through all that just to get him kicked out?"

"One ace. I'm just say'n—"

"Besides, what do you suggest I do? Quit my voice lessons?"

"Nah, but maybe we should send her a text or an email tonight, see what's up. She'll probably act like there ain't a problem, but at least she won't be lett'n it build and build until—'oy! What cards were those?"

"Three twos."

"Bull shit and you know it!"

For once, Yugi took the cards, but she had meant it that way. With all four aces in her hand, if the game went as planned…

"Sounds like a good enough plan. We'll send her a text."

"You'll send her a text. One three."

Yugi sighed. "Fine. Two fours."

"Bull shit!" Flip. "Aw man…"

As Joey grumbled away at her half a deck of cards, Yugi breathed a tense sigh. Good thing she didn't mention to Joey how she found Mr. Atem attractive. Joey would have a freak about Yugi going to get her heart broken on a teacher, but it wasn't like it was a big deal. Yugi saw attractive people all the time. That didn't mean she crushed on them or even fell in love. That seemed like something that grew over time with careful consideration and agency. She wasn't going to do anything stupid with her voice teacher, and it wasn't like he would go for anything stupid anyways. Someone that beautiful had to want someone equally beautiful.

Birds of a feather flocked together, after all.

Yugi successfully ignored the twinge of pain at the thought as she sent a short text to Tea while Joey grumbled.

When she didn't answer back, Joey said, "It isn't like she's that super close of a friend anyways. More like one of dem classmate friends, you know?"

"I guess so. Though why would you be concerned about her avoiding us then? Or me, I guess."

Joey snorted. "Because she's obvious. Does the whole glare and hair flip and everything. You're just too nice to notice. If it weren't for the fact that she's a complete gossip, I'd say good riddance. She's too prissy for us anyways."

Yugi felt a bit affronted by that. "I hope you aren't saying we're butches."

"Nah, I'm a butch. You're too sweet."

"No I'm not! Otherwise I would have defended Tea by now, you're being so mean."

"My point exactly."

"And, you know, it isn't so bad to be a girl."

Joey rolled her eyes and stuck one long, lean leg out on across the carpet. "Yeah, sure, whatev. Want to play Mortal Combat? That old Playstation of yours still works, right?"

Yugi grimaced. Maybe Joey did have a point. Tea was awfully…girly compared to them. Yugi took in her room and tried to measure out if she could tell what gender stayed in it, but all she could pick out was purple, her favorite color, and a mirror rimmed by hair clips that she used to control her wildly dyed hair. Other than that, it was a bookshelf full of sci-fi novels, CDs, and video games.

She thought of Mr. Atem and deflated a bit. If she weren't so small, he probably wouldn't even notice she was a girl. It wasn't like she had much in the way of breasts even. If she wore any kind of T-shirt that wasn't skin-tight, you wouldn't even see them at all. Unlike Joey, who, despite her long, lanky frame, had the body of a model rather than a man, even when she held down her own breasts with sport bras.

In a sudden urge to verify with herself of her own gender, she said, "Nah, let's do something new. Want to paint nails?"

Joey gave her a weird look. "Do you even own any fingernail polish?"

"Uh, I got some black and glow in the dark…from last Halloween."

Joey threw back her shaggy head and hooted with laughter. "Aw man. Look, Yug, it's not a bad thing to be a butch." Joey stilled abruptly. A bad vibe prickled her neck.

Sure enough, when her friends chin came down, a devilish, frightening smirk had split her face.

"You found yourself a boy, didn' ya?"

Yugi flinched. "J-Joey! It's just freaking fingernail polish!"

"You've been my friend since fourth grade, don't you dare try'n hide it."

"No! Really!"

"Fine then. Go get yer old sticky Halloween paints. Let's do this. I doubt you'll hold up."

Joey's smile didn't leave.

Yugi wanted to smash her head into the floor and never get up. But since that sounded borderline suicidal, she got up and locked herself in the bathroom for five minutes before returning with the fingernail polish, determined to not crack even a bit, even to Joey.

Ten minutes later, Joey was waltzing about the room as Mr. Atem and cracking up every time Yugi covered her eyes and blushed a deeper shade. It wasn't like she had a crush on him or anything, but Yugi so rarely said anything about the opposite sex being attractive. Joey knew that, but she couldn't let an opportunity to tease her mercilessly slide by.

"Oh, which reminds me, I think I know who is writing your poems."

Yugi latched onto the new subject like a lifeline. "Really? Who?"

Joey plopped onto the bed and folded her legs, smirking. "Seto Kaiba."

Yugi screwed up her face and pulled her hand back to observe her glow in the dark finger work. "Oh, please."

"Oh yes! Listen, it makes sense—"

"No it doesn't—"

"Yes it does! Opposites attract, right? Yer tiny, he's tall, and you're the only one who's ever beat'n him at…at anything, really, and everyone knows he pays way too much attention to you."

"Because he thinks I'm his rival. He wants to beat me one day."

"Or so he says! Honestly, who does that anymore? It's like a badly written anime. Pfft, rival."

Yugi blowed on her fingertips and rolled her eyes. "He didn't write them."

"What? Come on, why not?"

Well, Joey wasn't always the sharpest crayon in the box. Yugi leveled a look at her. "Because he likes you, numnuts."

The little bottle of black polish tipped across Joey's lap as she jerked the brush too hard. Cursing, she quickly picked it up, screwing it close, but the damage was done to Joey's pajama bottoms. Yugi jumped up to find something that would fit her tall friend. She found some pajama shorts that went to Yugi's knee, but acted just shy of booty shorts on Joey. The tall girl took a look at them in the mirror to make sure she didn't have some buttcheek hanging out (best not give Yugi's grandpa a heart attack if she should go downstairs) before sitting back down on the floor.

"Now you're just being stupid," she said. "The guy can't pass up a chance to be an ass to me. Some show of affection, unless you're ten."

"I didn't say he was mature about it," said Yugi, wrinkling her nose at her smudged pinky. Oh well.

"Guys are stupid. I hate them." Joey gave a theatrical sigh. "Why couldn't you be a dude, Yug? Then I could just marry you and get it over with."

Yugi laugh. They'd had this conversation before. "You'd have to be the dude. We both know I'd make one pathetic guy."

"And I can't be lesbian, because girls are gross." Joey wrinkled her nose.

"And God says no," says Yugi, trying not to laugh.

"Too bad nunneries are dead boring. Bet they wouldn't let you play Mortal Combat there. But really, it's Kaiba. Think about it, Yug."

But she didn't.

Eventually, even night owl Joey got bored of Mortal Combat and they turned in for the night. Before she turned off her bedside lamp, Yugi made a show of pulling out an English book so as to not draw Joey's attention. As she made a show of catching up in  _To Kill a Mockingbird_ , she reread the lines of the poem she had managed to hide from her best friend's view. It wasn't embarrassing in the least, and she wasn't afraid of Joey mocking her. But there was just something else…something precious…and it just hadn't seem right to reveal such intimacy to a third party. Even as she reread them, something within her trembled and stole splotches of her breath.

_"If I die_

_and find no welcome_

_at heaven's door,_

_I will remember her voice_

_and miss out_

_on nothing._

_Hell will hold no fire_

_because her tongue_

_carved words_

_just for me,_

_and her lips defy_

_all temptations,_

_except for that_

_of a kiss."_

 


	6. What's Wrong?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tea denies being grouchy and Mr. Keith is a creep.

“What made you think I’d care if you got lessons alone with Mr. Atem?”

The words were spoken to Yugi in a hiss beneath the banging of the piano as Mr. Atem lectured the bass section. It was the Monday after the weekend with Joey, in which Tea hadn’t bothered to respond to any of Yugi’s texts.

“—just because you’re in bass cleft doesn’t give you an excuse to be tone deaf! Especially you, Tim, and yes, I can hear you—stop laughing, Boyd, you’re not much better!” Mr. Atem had gone into demon teacher mode.

Yugi glanced to the side at Tea, who was looking at her with a mean little downturn of her pink-sparkled lips. She gulped.

“I-It was Joey, she thought you were avoiding me and that you’d be mad.”

Tea sniffed. “Why? Because he thought my voice more perfect than yours? If anything, I thought you’d be mad at me for not being pulled back for extra lessons. I mean, if there’s anything Mr. Atem can’t stand, it’s someone who is out of tune.”

As though to verify her whispered words, Mr. Atem exploded, “What, do I have to pound out D? If you’d just put your damn phones away once in a while—oh fine, get over to the piano. You too, tenors.”

“He has such talent,” she said in a lighter voice, “for finding the best of voices even in a whole choir. You know what he said to me the other day?”

Yugi shook her head, not trusting herself to speak when Mr. Atem’s displeased glare leveled on the soprano section and instructed them to work with the altos in the orchestra room, where there was a spare piano.

“He said he had picked out my voice from the rest and had wanted an excuse to hear it without seeming inappropriate, so he invited me in on the guise of teaching you.” She stiffened and glanced down, rubbing her lips and looking concerned. “I’m not saying your bad, Yugi. You have quite a nice tone, it’s just sometimes, when you sing high, you’re quite out of tune. He wanted to clarify that without hurting your feelings. Two birds with one stone.” She sighed as they stepped off the risers and followed the rest of the tiny crowd of sopranos and altos. “It’s so sad that he’s a teacher. If he shows any favoritism towards us it could be taken wrong. Do you remember when that janitor got locked up for getting caught with a freshman girl giving him a blowjob? Didn’t she get pregnant too?”

Yugi didn’t want to answer, not just because the subject of blowjobs in general made her want to run away worse than ever, but because an uncomfortable twist had come over her stomach, like a screw into her diaphragm. She had sung high notes in the tape and they had sounded in tune. During warm ups Mr. Atem always tried to push her higher, even assured her not to worry because she always sang in tune, which he said he appreciated. And if anything, Mr. Atem was more than vocal about her weaknesses, as that’s what they worked on each lesson. Question was, why was Tea lying?

Even though she told herself she didn’t care, it still wiggled uncomfortably in the back of her mind when Mr. Keith slapped a yardstick across his desk. Several students jumped.

It was his grim frown and bulging eyes that really snapped Yugi to attention, though.

“Hear I got some low-life whiners in here crying to their mommies about the way I do things,” he growled. “Going to grow up to be fine well-fare trash, crying about injustices like that and hoping they get their way. Because of them I’m on probation and you lot get five pages added to your midterms. A crying shame, seeing as my class is the only one that gives you a taste of the real world.”

For a brief, horrifying breath, Yugi thought those eyes flickered towards her and popped just a little bit more, but then they swept the other way and Mr. Keith went on about how, in the work field of ‘the real world,’ whiners got fired, and that no one should be trying to get him fired just because they got bad grades out of their own laziness.

A lot of what he said seemed to be rather jumbled to Yugi, and not unlike other rants Mr. Keith had given. But just in case it had anything to do with her, she stayed at attention and tried not to look too much the victim in her seat.

Eventually he got on to Othello once more, which they were just finishing up, and Yugi dared to relax. Class ended, and she could hardly wait to be out the door and to voice lessons, where she could sing away the fear of the day.

Then he called her name.

Yugi stood still as the last of the students flowed passed her. She didn’t look back, she couldn’t. A paranoid twittering in her brain told her that, should she see his face, all her fear would show through and he’d just get even angrier, or worse, laugh. Her coward ways never ceased to amuse her English teacher.

The door clicked shut.

“Get over here, shrimp.”

Her knees stuck, then wobbled as she turned with a quick swish of her little skirt. Her hands had turned to ice.

Mr. Keith loomed larger than ever in front of her, a tower of muscle and too tight school T-shirt.

Then he lowered his face down to her level, having to bend in half just to do so. His breath smelled rancid, of socks and old Pepsi.

“You’ve been mighty unfair towards me, little girl, don’t you think? Come on. Use your words.”

“I-I-I don’t k-know sir.” He wore gym shorts, and it was disgusting, because gym shorts weren’t made to hide a man this big. She averted her eyes, a new, darker fear surfacing from the back of her mind.

“I tried to help you grow some spine, get over that cute little st-st-st-stutter of yours, and you go spread stories to your weirdo gay choir teacher. I’m hurt.”

Yugi couldn’t breathe. Her knees wouldn’t stop.

“Now, I want you to apologize. If you’re sweet enough to me, I’ll let it go.” He breathed a low chuckle. More rancid old pop and BO. “Come on. See if you cannot stutter.”

Stuttering was the least of her concern, as her voice had vanished.

“Come on, sweet. Say sorry.”

One of those large fingers tapped her chin up. Its sheer size was enough to bump up her face in direct gaze of the bloodshot, popping blue eyes.

It came out of her reflexively. “Sorry!”

He seemed pleased. “Good. And, just so we’re on the same page, if I hear anymore of your cry whining…”

The finger ran lower. Lower. Then in between her tiny breasts.

“I’m going to need a better apology to let you off the hook. Now, off you go.”

The big hand pinched her shoulder to twist her round, where he batted her on the butt and out the door. She didn’t think her sweaty hand would hold the handle, but it did, and suddenly she was out in the hallway where the last of the students milled about their lockers talking. Like a robot she marched to the choir room. She couldn’t let it show. She couldn’t let the others see. She couldn’t let him hear—couldn’t cause a scene. She should skip lessons today and just go straight home. If she went as she was now, Yami would see, Yami would tell. Why had he told last time? Hadn’t he gotten the hint that she hadn’t been asking for protection?

But there seemed to be a disconnect between her body and her brain. While her brain calmly instructed her to put one foot in front of the other and go through those double doors and outside the school, her feet turned into the choir room.

Mr. Atem sat at the piano as usual, this time plucking out a line from their choir accompaniment. He twisted round to greet her, fingers still playing.

“Hello, Yugi. I’ve got a great lessons set out for…” his fingers froze. The music fell silent.

The door shut off the talking outside, plunging the room into silence.

Yugi could hear the clock ticking.

“What’s wrong?”

The dam inside her was breaking at a phenomenal rate now. She shouldn’t be here, he would see, she hadn’t even put up a fight—she could handle this on her own, she didn’t need a knight—Mr. Keith was still in the building---

And the line he had traced from her chin to her bellybutton burned. It made her feel icky. So very, very icky.

Mr. Atem stood up. “Yugi?”

_Snap._

It was the fight or flight response. Yugi ran. The short space between her and that tiny, foam lined studio vanished in a blink of an eye. She slammed the door behind her, plunging the room into darkness. Her fingers trembled as they found the button lock and pushed it in.

There was a thump on the other side of the door. Above her racing heartbeat she heard, “Lord! Yugi! What happened? Please, tell me!”

He tried other comforting words that she didn’t really register as she had backed away, hoping to suck in the darkness, hoping to suck in the quiet and stop herself from screaming. Somehow, distantly, she knew she had started to cry, but she was too focused on trying to make herself breathe. Her head spun. She felt dizzy.

She rubbed the line between her breasts. His finger had been so big. She had been so small. It would go—he had heard—

Mr. Atem’s pleas fell silent mid-word. In the dead silence she thought she heard a door click shut.

She slapped her hands over her mouth when a booming, all too familiar voice wheedled its way through the sound-proof walls.

“Hey, just looking for that Yugi girl, she left behind her bag in my classroom. Heard she went in here.”


	7. Tattle Tale

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Mr. Atem encourages Yugi to report Mr. Keith and gives her a ride home.

Yugi started to hyperventilate. This had to be a nightmare; nothing could go this wrong so quickly. Mr. Atem would make the connection between her reaction and Mr. Keith’s arrival, he would say something, Mr. Keith would know, Mr. Keith would…Mr. Keith would….

“No. She must have walked through while I was in my office.”

Yugi froze.

“Ah. Guess I’ll just take this to the front office then.”

 _Don’t tell him I come here, don’t tell me about our lessons,_ she begged quietly. If he knew, he could wait for her after school---know where she went when all the students went home.

But Mr. Atem said nothing.

“Thanks. Have a good day,” said Mr. Keith.

“You too.”

Quiet. Another distant hint of a click.

…was he gone?

So dizzy. She had to breathe. She lowered her hand and chanced a breath which came in as a loud, harsh suck. Her head steadied, but her stomach cramped.

Just as she was thinking she had escaped passing out, a loud scrape of keys at the door made her jump. Then it opened, blinding her.

A warm hand wrapped about her forearm and pulled her whole body out of the dark. Before her eyes could adjust she found herself in the firm grasp of Mr. Atem, who held her up and ducked his head to level his sharp, serious gaze into hers.

“He’s gone. It’s okay.”

Yugi blinked, dazed. His face was so close, so…nice. He really did look like a rock star, the nice kind, not the Kiss kind.

“What happened?”

At first, she didn’t process the words. Before she could figure out the safest answer, her mouth started to blubber on its own.

“Why did you tell him? Why did you say anything—I-I-I didn’t mean for him t-to—he was so mad, so scary, and then he touched me and said—oh, God, please don’t say anything about this, please, don’t let him know—“

“Wait, he touched you?”

The knife-like fury in his tone frightened her into deeper hysterias. “I’m sorry! I didn’t mean to! I turned and I left, I didn’t mean to throw up—d-d-don’t tell, don’t tell, please—“

“How did he touch you?”

“---he said his class is l-like the real world and I—please, he’s so much bigger than me and i-i-it would—it would—“

“Yugi, calm down and just answer the question.”

“It w-wasn’t anything—it wasn’t anything—“

He shook her—hard. “Yugi!”

She snapped her jaw closed, just to open it as she once more fought for breath. Still wearing that terrifying mask, he pushed her to one of the steps of the choir rise and into a sitting position, where he told her to put her head between her knees. She did so. After a few minutes to the calming tick of the classroom clock she found her breath growing slower, deeper, and the screaming in her head starting to die.

At last, his warm hand left her shoulder and through her ankles she could see his leather boots. He had squatted down in front of her. Her face was wet and her nose felt stuffy. She could taste salt, and maybe a bit of snot. Aw jeeze, she must be such a mess. How could she ever face him now?

Then she realized she was in a skirt and quickly closed her knees, red-hot in a full on body blush.

“Can you please answer my question? It’s very important.”

Yugi shuddered. “I-it wasn’t anything.”

“It was something if you mentioned it. It’s okay, I won’t tell him, nor will I think you’re silly. Did he threaten you?”

Yugi stayed silent.

“Yugi…please.”

“I can’t. You’ll get me in trouble.”

“I didn’t mean to get you—I was trying to protect you. I’m sorry I didn’t think of this.” Was that pain she heard? “But I still need to hear what happened. Please, Yugi, you gave me a heart attack, you looked so…”

When the quiet stretched on till it nearly broke the comfortable range, Yugi took a deep breath. He wouldn’t let her go unless she spoke. It was probably the right thing to do anyways, right? Or was there even a right thing to do in this sort of situation?

So she told him, quietly, and with a lot of stuttering and chattering of her teeth as she trembled. He didn’t speak a word, and for that she was glad, for if he stopped her before she was finished she wasn’t sure if she could start up again.

“I’m probably freaking out over nothing,” she concluded.

“Don’t.”

After so long of quiet, the snap caused her to bite her tongue. Owie.

Leaving him to say, “you have every reason to be afraid. He’s a bully who has authority over you, and an adult at that, and he more or less threatened to molest you if you even hinted to anyone that he was—was sexually harassing you. Besides, you didn’t complain about him to me. You merely stated the facts of the way he treated you. If anyone is overreacting, he is.”

She sniffed and dared to look up, even though her face would be a puffy monstrosity. “Really?”

“Yes. Most bullies do. Has to do with how extremely vulnerable they feel to the world. Pathetic.”

Now that she could see his face again, she found it difficult to look away, even with the remains of that scary, furious look still sharpening his features. Tea was right. How could someone so handsome manage to look so intimidating?

“Do you wear contacts?”

He looked down at her in surprise. “What?”

She blushed and ducked her head. “Your eyes. I was just wondering…”

“Oh. No, I don’t wear contacts. They’re real, believe it or not. Though I was wondering the same thing about you.”

“What? Contacts?”

“Yeah. I’ve never seen such bright purple, and I thought that, well, if you were daring enough with your hair…?”

She smiled at her hands. “No. They’re real too. I did try contacts once, though, to make them more normal. Ended up scratching them out and my eyes swelled up.”

“Probably a good thing.”

“Why? Are contacts bad for you?”

“Not at all,” he said quickly before standing up with a low groan as his knees popped. “I doubt you’re up to any singing today. Would you like a ride home? I don’t feel entirely comfortable leaving you on your own with that dick holding wrestling practice next door…”

Her heart leapt. All alone in a car with Mr. Atem—then shook herself. What a ridiculous thought. He was her teacher!

But…a ride would be very nice, as the idea of walking home on her still-shaky knees didn’t sound appealing.

Thus, Mr. Atem walked her to the office where they picked up her bag and then led her outside to a nondescript, green Dodge Neon.

“C-could you, um, not say anything?”

He gave her a look, which she dodged by putting the car between them. Once she was in the passenger seat, however, there was no escape.

“About Keith?”

She nodded, not trusting herself to look up. The car smelled of vanilla, and besides an empty refill mug left in the cup holder, was relatively clean. She put her bag between her feet.

“Are you going to give in to his threat, then?”

Yugi shivered. “I-I don’t want to cause t-trouble—“

“He’s the one causing trouble, you would be doing what is right.”

“But I’d just be doing what he says—tattle telling.”

He frowned so deep that his eyebrows nearly made a perfect, angry V. She twisted around even more so she wouldn’t see it, not even out of the corner of her eye.

Mr. Atem closed his door and started the engine. It came up with a well-oiled purr, which impressed her. The car had to be at least twenty years old. She wondered if it was because he babied it or because he had just gotten it that way.

“I thought you’d be old enough to know the difference between tattle telling and standing up for yourself. If you ask me to promise not to tell, I can’t do that, because I can’t let a bully like that get away with treating his students, let alone children, like that.”

Inwardly she flinched a bit when he said ‘children.’ That’s right. He saw her, especially her, as a child because she was all too aware of how tiny she was. Many had mistaken her for being several years younger than she really was. And he saw the rest of her peers as children as well. But they were that, weren’t they? Until they graduated. Why did that bother her so much?

But Mr. Atem was still talking, and he was checking both ways before pulling the Neon out of the school parking lot and into traffic. “But you do have a point. I’m not the one who should say anything. You should be the one to report him.”

Her stomach plummeted. “No!”

“Yes,” he said, leveling that V-eyebrow look at her as he stopped at a red light. “Do you like how he treats you? Are you really okay with him getting away with that?”

To this, she could only drop her gaze to her feet. “I’ll be okay. It’s not like he’s hurting me, and it’s only for what’s left of the school year.”

He fell quiet, and she wondered if he was angry or frustrated with her. When she dared to squeeze a glance at him as he turned onto the highway, she saw that, though the frustration was there, the V was gone to be replaced with something…sad?

“How about if he did this to another kid? You said yourself that you didn’t blame that wrestler for how he reacted to you. What if he was doing something similar to him?”

Yugi recoiled. Mr. Atem nodded at her reaction, then asked where her house was, which she gave through the stuttering of her own thoughts and feelings.

“What if there were more kids like you who needed someone to stand up for them? What if they’re just like you, but they don’t have someone like me to tell Keith to go away, that they weren’t there, or just to tell them it’s not their fault?”

Yugi didn’t want to think it, or else her next words would make her cry. “But what can I do? I’ll probably just throw up again if I try to talk about it, and what if they don’t believe me?” She already knew the answer to that. If they didn’t believe her and told her she was silly, Mr. Keith would hear about it, and this time there would be nowhere to run to.

She desperately hoped she was being paranoid.

“Then find someone else to go with you, someone else who Mr. Keith has mistreated.” At the smile on his face, Yugi recoiled even further. She knew instantly who he was talking about.

“But I don’t even know his name!”

“Then find it.”

“But what if I s-s-c-clam up, or—or—“

“Then write him a letter.” Mr. Atem sighed and clicked on his turn signal to switch lanes. “Look, I’m not trying to make you do anything, please believe me. But if you don’t do it, I will. This time I’ll learn from my mistakes, though, and be sure to talk to your parents beforehand so you’re home and not in his range when he gets the news. I know that would be easier on you, but I said I’d try and help you to not be so shy anymore.”

“You mean not be a freaking coward,” she muttered at the window.

“There is no crime in being afraid. Everyone has fears, and bravery isn’t the lack of fears. It’s choosing to act in spite of your fears. That’s all it is. Making the choice and following through.”

“So, you’re saying if I go ahead and report Mr. Keith, even though I’m afraid of,” she looked to the ceiling, “everything…that I’ll learn to be brave?”

“It will _be_ brave. It’s not that complicated.”

“I-I don’t t-think you…” she couldn’t say that, not after how nice he was being. But Yugi felt more than a little frustrated with Mr. Atem. How could he make it sound so simple when it was anything but? Puking in front of a crowd of people hadn’t happened for the first time in Mr. Keith’s class. It had happened long before that. It always started when you were little, the fear, when that first big person proved just how wrong and pitiful you could be.

Did he really understand what he was asking of her? The idea meant she’d have to imagine him being afraid, and that just didn’t compute in her mind. She couldn’t even imagine what his face might look like if he was afraid, or just what he would be afraid of. Even dressed everyday in his button up shirts and slacks, he wore leather jewelry and boots, had his hair done up in crazy tri-colored spikes, and had a glaring attitude that dared anyone to make him care about what they thought. Trying to think of him afraid was like trying to imagine Rambo being afraid.

Not to mention he was a male teacher with the strength to shove a teenage boy bigger than him up a locker, while she was a tiny, tiny girl who barely managed to force herself to go to school rather than lock herself up in her closet.

…No…he couldn’t understand. But Yugi could understand that he was just trying to help.

When he pulled into the little gameshop her grandpa owned, which had their little apartment above it, she immediately saw the closed sign and groaned.

“What is it?”

“Shop’s closed. It shouldn’t be.” After school was when most of grandpa’s customers came in: kids. She got out to get a closer look at the yellow card left for her underneath the sign.

_Yugi,_

_Your mother has to stay late for a business meeting and an old friend of mine has just arrived in town. Dinner is in the fridge. Don’t wait up for us and be safe._

_Grandpa_

“What is it?”

She nearly jumped out of her skin. Mr. Atem had followed her up to the door. His little green Neon hummed behind him.

“Nothing,” she said.

It only took him a second to take in the note. She wondered if she should put it in her pocket already, but a faint sense of dread she only half understood was creeping into her stomach. The one day she needed someone to be home, to reassure her, to talk to, or to just distract her from her own thoughts, and she was alone. Some crazy part of her wondered if Mr. Keith knew where she lived and she almost laughed out loud. Of course not. But it didn’t help the paranoid part of her not run away with the idea.

“Huh,” he said, hesitating as though conflicted with something. At least he had backed off.

Yugi shifted uncomfortably. What was it he was thinking about to look at her like that? As though regretting bringing her here? “Guess this is good-bye. Thanks a lot for the ride,” she said.

“No problem…actually, Yugi, if you have nothing to do,” he hesitated again, but pushed on, “you could always check out a little musical fair of sorts at the park not far from here. That is, if you’d rather not have a bunch of time alone with nothing but homework to distract you.”

Now that was just a little bit unnerving. How had he known she had been thinking about just that?

“A music fair? I’ve never heard of anything around this time.”

“Well, you wouldn’t. It’s a bit of a, um, underground bohemian sort of thing.” He gave her a smile which brought the word ‘dashing’ to her mind, along with the threat of a blush. “I was planning on going there after our lessons anyways. If you don’t mind, I could give you a ride. If not, I can just give you directions. I think you’d really like it. There’s a lot of local artists that will be there.”

Suddenly, Yugi wanted nothing more than to go. She didn’t know what she imagined, and she didn’t like crowds, but if there were a spot somewhere underneath a tree she could hide and just listen to all that music…

Thus, she found herself slipping back into Mr. Atem’s car and vaguely feeling like she was doing something wrong. But the park he told her about wasn’t that far away at all, and she had left a note for her grandfather on the back of the yellow card as to where she had went. Why should she feel nervous?

 _Dude, he’s your teacher_ , said a voice that sounded too much like Joey.

 _This isn’t a date,_ she told the voice.

_But it never really starts with a date, does it?_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you got a mo, check out my first published novel, "Out of Duat," on Amazon! If you like romance in ancient Egypt, time-travel, and just enough necromancy to make it not an ooey gooey mess of whiny drama, you might like it. It just came out on the Kindle too!


	8. Courage in the Park

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Yugi joins Mr. Atem at a bohemian musicians' get together and gets to meet his eccentric Uncle Simeon.

The moment she opened the door she was washed by a clean breeze carrying the scent of freshly mowed grass and the promise of evening. She had been coming to this park every since she was a little child, but the thrum of quiet songs and gentle murmur of conversation transformed it more than the Christmas lights hanging in lazy loops on the lowest branches of the trees. Under each tree was a circle of people on some quilts, and in every circle there was at least one instrument, almost always a guitar or flute, though she thought she spotted a violin, an accordion, an a set of bongos. A straggle of children played on the old sun bleached play set nearby.             

She took another breath, and suddenly the chill of late September vanished and summer returned. A summer night, filled with that same musk…

And music. Singing, guitars, flutes, talking, laughing…

She almost forgot to be nervous.

“Like it?” he said, though the grin told her he already knew she did. “Follow me, I got some friends I’d like to introduce you to.”

“How long has this been going for? Why are they here?” she asked as she followed down the gentle slope from the parking lot.

“It’s been going on ever since I can remember,” he said. “As for why? Because they like music without all the fanfare. This was what is was usually used for, you know that?”

“Used for what?”

He gave a vague gesture over the gathered people and soft white Christmas lights. “Communion. Expression. Connection.”

She wasn’t sure she followed, but she thought she could understand. Music without all the flashy lights and publicity, she figured.

“’Ey! Yami!”

Mr. Atem waved as an older, squat man with wild salt and pepper hair waved at him, a russet rotund guitar tucked against his chest. A small group of people turned around and waved at them at his greeting.

“Holy blessed Mary, did you finally get yourself a girlfriend? Please say yes,” said the graying man.

Mr. Atem laughed while Yugi blushed furiously.

“She’s a student of mine. I thought I’d bring her here for a lesson.”

“And what, you thought you’d make me do the work for you?”

“Something along the lines of that.”

A few people chuckled as the man made a show of being right and straightening out his plaid lumberjack shirt. They scooted to the side on the blanket for Yugi and Atem to sit down at. There could have been ten people total, twelve now with Yugi and her teacher.

“So,” said the guitarist, a hand to his beard. “Care to introduce us good-for-nothing Nephew?”

“This is Yugi. Yugi, this is my good-for-nothing Uncle Simeon. He’s taught me a thing or two about music.”

“Practically everything he knows,” Uncle Simeon said with a sniff. “Though, I’ve got to say, I’m really digging the hair. Change of color here and a snip there and she could be your mini-me, couldn’t she? You didn’t convince her to do her hair like that, did you?”

Yugi put a hand on her head self-consciously.

“I’ve got better things to do then make speeches on hair color,” said Atem.

“Alright. Well, what am I suppose to be teaching her?”

“Music.” Atem made another vague gesture. “So teach.”

A few more people laughed and Yugi smiled sheepishly. She could feel the eyes on her now, but whenever she met a pair it was atop a kind smile. Somewhere off to their right, a violin started up in a jolly jig, which was followed by a cheer and clapping to the beat.

Simeon, however, had a finger and thumb to his beard, eyeing her thoughtfully. She tried to meet his gaze the best she could, but it didn’t last long before she was reduced to staring at her shoes again.

“No need to be afraid of me, little one. My bark is worse than my bite. What kind of music do you like?”

She looked to Atem for answers, but he just grinned in encouragement. She forced her chin up to the older man.

“Um…well I like old rock and…some blue jazz. And sometimes a little, uh…” she felt her face heat up. “Blue grass.”

He didn’t laugh though. In fact, he beamed. “Wonderful! Just what I like! Know Billy Joel?”

That perked her up. “Who doesn’t?”

More chuckles. One of the women said, “Play us some Billy Joel, Simeon.”

“Yeah, something sweet and slow,” said another.

“I’m sweet and slow enough, at my age. Nah, I’m playing something that will actually help, rude young’ns.”

Those in the crowd weren’t entirely young. Two looked even older than him, but they just laughed as he screwed up his face in thought. Then, with a wide smile, he settled against his rotund guitar and eased into some chords. The hum of strings were soft, nylon, Yugi supposed, though not quiet. They eased into each other, but picked into quick, easy beat that instantly got a few in the group clapping along.

And then he broke into the words in a beautiful, lilting tenor.

 _“Come out Virginia, don't let 'em wait_  
You Catholic girls start much too late  
Aw but sooner or later it comes down to faith  
Oh I might as well be the one.”

Yugi perked up, feeling her cheeks ball up in a smile. She knew this song! And the old man—he sounded wonderful! Happy, years younger, and the tiny lights above them seemed to warm and brighten.

Atem started to clap and sing along in harmony with a few others, making his uncle’s smile grown.

But Yugi didn’t feel her own throat start to hum along until the old man threw back his head and hooted into the chorus of ‘only the good die young!’

In a breath between notes he muttered, just loud enough for them to hear, “sure hope I’m wicked as sin, then.”

“ _So, come on, Virginia, show me a sign_  
Send up a signal I'll throw you the line  
The stained-glass curtain you're hiding behind  
Never lets in the sun  
Darling, only the good die young!”

Now the rest of the group was singing, along with Yugi, who could hardly hear herself from the rest of the voices, and found that the most fun of all.

Soon, another group joined in, bringing in a harmonica for a sax (they could do that?), a fiddle joining in a spontaneous harmony that only worked two thirds of the time, and the according blaring the chords along with the guitar. It definitely wasn’t record quality anymore, but to Yugi, she had never before heard anything more beautiful and remarkable before. It wasn’t the sound over the headphones anymore. It wasn’t one person making music. It was many becoming one person. Yugi had never before realized how lonely she had been, or how cold it had been to be just one soul.

But for the first time in her life, she could feel the heart of people next to her, feel their same joy, singing the same words as her, thinking the same way, feeling the same way, all experimenting and following along with the older man underneath the tree. It was almost too good to be real. Didn’t this only happen in movies?

For the first time in her life, in a group of people, Yugi wasn’t afraid. Rather, she never wanted to go back into her closet again.

They all seemed to finish at different times, trailing off into spare verses, singing, but before the sporadic harmonica ran out of breath Uncle Simeon roared out in mock anger, “can’t I just have my moment without all ya butt’n in? Good Lord!”

They all laughed back, some shouting that, no, he couldn’t have his moment.

“Yeah, you start, we’re all coming in.”

Uncle Simeon looked at the accordionist who had spoken. “And you, what kind of harmony was that, you big copycat?”

“Hey, accordions are closer to pianos than guitars anyways.”

“Sure. Though Mandy, that harmonica, woo! Didn’t expect any less from you.”

“I don’t know, I only knew where to go by listening to Yami. Awesome at finding his notes, per usual.”

Mr. Atem acted to look embarrassed, but even Yugi could tell he was pleased.

At some point the chatter finally died down and the other instrumentalists wandered back to their trees, Uncle Simeon returned his gaze to Yugi.

“So, learn enough?” he said.

“What was I suppose to learn?” she asked.

The old man slapped his hand to his forehead. “Oh bother, what’s that dumb nephew of mine teaching you these days? Alright, I’ll make it simple: did that make you happy?”

Instantly, she felt she could burst. Her face hurt from the force of her smile and she nearly hopped up with the force of her “Yes!”

Mr. Atem fidgeted next to her. Uncle Simeon gave him an interesting look she couldn’t read, however, before asking his next question, “Why did it make you happy? And don’t tell me just because it was fun, that’s a dummy answer.”

She opened her mouth, but find she, for once, had too much to say. Why did it make her happy? The sound, the pound, like sharing a heartbeat, not being alone, everyone celebrating, celebrating that they were alive, that only the good die young and—hey, we all like Billy Joel? And…

Then it came to her. “We were together. More together than we could ever be.”

“I think the word you were looking for is intimate,” said the woman from before. “All human beings need to connect with another, be intimate, know they’re not alone. Expression.”

“Poetry down, Shauna.”

“Shut up.”

Uncle Simeon nodded. “I like that. Music is like making love without all the naked mess.”

Yugi’s face flamed and Atem spluttered, “Uncle, she’s a minor.”

“What, you don’t think high school kids don’t think about sex? Some deluded teacher you are.” And speaking over his nephew’s protests, he asked Yugi, “And how does that help us be better musicians?”

Yugi thought hard as she tried to push down her blush. “Um, well, what’s the point of making music if you don’t want it?”

“If you don’t love it,” corrected Simeon. “And now, since I want you to think on that and not have to spoon feed you, how about we give someone else a turn, eh? I want us to be all sexed out by the time we head in for the night.”

“Uncle,” groaned Mr. Atem amidst the hooting of the others.

By the time Yugi started to admit that she should head home, night had come, a few people had already left, and her throat was sore from singing and talking. She had never before felt so relaxed and comfortable in her own skin till then. Yes she was still the more reserved of the group, but she found she could speak without stuttering or overanalyzing what she said before hand. And when Mr. Atem offered to give her a ride home, she didn’t agonize over what she had said or wondered if she should had said things differently.

Before they left, Uncle Simeon pushed himself to his feet and pulled Mr. Atem aside. Yugi watched, trying not to appear like she was eavesdropping as she tried to guess what they were talking about by their faces. At one time they did glance her way and she flinched to face another directions.

When Mr. Atem returned, however, he was just as relaxed as before. He opened the car door for her this time and then slid into the other side as she inhaled the vanilla inside. Strange, she couldn’t see an air freshener. And now that she had a second whiff, it wasn’t entirely vanilla. Something else, something like musk, underlined it all.

“Do you hate being you right now, Yugi?”

She turned to frown at him as he turned on the car and pull out. Strange he should ask that.

But now that she thought about it, “No.”

“Do you feel afraid?”

She blinked. “No.”

“Now, wouldn’t that be great if you could make everyone feel like that?” And with a small, soft smile that framed a strange heat into his eyes she couldn’t understand, but made her feel embarrassed, he said, “Isn’t music great?”

Yes. Yes it was.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh, if you get a chance, check out my first published novel, "Out of Duat," on Amazon! It's a romance in ancient Egypt screwed up by time-travel and spiced up with necromancy.


	9. I Saw Light

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The love ju ju is getting worse.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A Christmas present from me to you! "Out of Duat" by T.S. Lowe is FREE on Amazon from December 16th to the 20th! So, if you got a mo, be sure to drop by and pick up your free ebook. ^.^ Thanks again for all your support.

_“I saw light,_

_where I thought no more_

_could shine._

_Precious, seamless,_

_just stand and dance_

_to the music your breath_

_tells you to._

_I won’t laugh,_

_but will stay_

_far away_

_so as to not capture your skirts_

_your ankles, your skin,_

_your breath_

_with my fingers,_

_oh, the light…”_

Yugi didn’t have the chance to hide away this poem before Joey could see. For once, it didn’t pay to have her best friend’s locker close to hers.

Joey gave a low whistle. “He’s hankering for you in a bad way. See dat?” She jabbed the paper with a finger. “’Skin.’ He wrote ‘skin.’”

Yugi pushed Joey’s head away and flapped her hands to keep it that way. “Stop making it weird!”

“I’m not. He’s da one who wrote it. ‘So as to not capture your skin, your breath, with my fingers’—please, doesn’t that just scream groping?” Then, at the growing red on her friend’s face, Joey’s mouth curved into a mischievous grin. “He wants to get ya naked, he wants to touuuuch you—“

“Joey—“

“—hold you—“

“Jo _eeey!_ ”

“— _dooo_ you!”

Yugi slapped her across the shoulder, hard. Once more, her easily blood affected face was hot. Ugh.

“I told you to stop! Do you want me to stay single forever?”

“Maybe,” she said with a grin. “I don’t think any raunchy perverted man could ever be worthy of my pure Yug, and it’d be unnecessary stress to follow you around all the time. Why can’t you just wait till you’re thirty-five like any good daughter?”

“Because you’re not my dad.”

“That’s beside the point here.” Joey peeked into Yugi’s locker while she took out the book she needed and stuffed the rest of her things in there. “So, any ideas as to who it is? Besides Kaiba, of course.”

Yugi groaned. “For the last time, it isn’t Kaiba.”

“I don’t much appreciate others gossiping about me.”

Both Yugi and Joey flinched, though Joey did so with a colorful curse. Seto Kaiba stood not a few feet behind them, leaning against the lockers on the other side of the hall and smirking through the crowd at them. A few students gave him and Joey annoyed looks as they passed.

Joey growled. “You know, breaking into other people’s conversations is considered rude in polite society.”

“Good thing this is high school, then. Hardly qualifies as polite society.” He pushed off from the lockers and weaved through to them, where he made no signs of leaving anytime soon. “What’s this about me?”

“Why do you care, asshole?”

“Language, puppy.”

“I’m not a dog!”

Yugi sighed. It hadn’t even been a full minute and it was already getting old. “Joey thinks you’re writing love poems to me.”

Joey glared at her. Seto just stared for a beat, then threw his head back in what Joey christened his ‘evil villain’ laugh.

“Oh please, this shrimp, mutt? Are you serious? I can’t even talk to her without dropping my face down to my navel.”

“Don’t talk about my friend like that!”

“Oh, do you need me to be more blunt for your little brain?”

“I’m plenty intelligent, you jerkweed! Did you write the poems or not?”

Seto smacked his forehead. “Wow.”

“Yes or no! Or is that too hard for yer rich ass—“

“No.”

“Was that so hard?”

“Very, seeing as I’m flabbergasted as to how even an idiot like you came up with an idea like that. The very idea of liking your shrimp friend makes me feel like a pedophile.” Seto leveled those blue eyes on Yugi. “You are seventeen, right?”

Joey threw her hands in the air. “That’s it. You and me after school, behind the gym. Winner keeps their jaw intact.”

“Sorry, I don’t fight girls.”

“Like hell you do!”

Neither of them had noticed the small crowd of students they were attracting, though Yugi had and was desperately looking for a covert way to wriggle out without catching anyone’s attention. At Joey’s roar, however, the attention of the last person she wanted looking their way came to.

They came in another too-tight t-shirt and American flag bandana. The blond teacher sneered at the two. Seto had had the mind to shut up on seeing him, but Joey was still shouting about Seto being to chicken to lose to her and have her publicize his humiliation to the whole school.

Yugi’s toes curled up into raisins as Mr. Keith’s gaze ran over her.

“Why don’t you just punch the chick already?” he said.

Kaiba stared. “Sir?”

“Go for it. Maybe that will finally shut her up.”

Now Joey was staring too. The scattered crowd of onlookers fell quiet.

“I’m waiting.”

“But, sir,” Kaiba had never looked so flustered. “Wouldn’t I get expelled?”

Here, Keith grinned. “Probably, but so would she. Don’t remember a time when that butch didn’t punch back. I don’t even really know if she is a girl.”

Yugi’s breath caught, not in surprise, but in sudden, uncontrollable rage. Sure Joey joked all the time about how much she hated being a girl, how she avoided anything prissy at all costs, and she even called herself a butch. But the fact someone like Mr. Keith should dare say that to her face—

But before Yugi could think of what to do, before Yugi could do more than take a step forward, Seto beat her to the punch.

Mr. Keith stumbled a bit from the force, eyes wide in shock. The entire hallway gasped as one. Joey looked almost more surprised than Mr. Keith.

Seto Kaiba brought his curled fist back to him, shaking, face flushed, and teeth bared.

 “You call yourself a teacher?”

Moving as though the cogs in his head had jammed, Mr. Keith straightened and leveled his narrowed gaze on the tall, lanky student.

“Why you little punk…”

Just then, a few other adults moved through, having finally noticed the commotion clogging up the hallway. They shouted a good deal for the kids to get going, to break it up, but stopped abruptly on finding Mr. Keith with a growing red bruise on his face and a very angry model student.

“What went on here?” asked a female Biology teacher.

“Mr. Kaiba here just punched me in the face,” said Mr. Keith. “He was fighting with the tall girl and then punched me when I tried to resolve it.”

Joey and Yugi just stood there, probably knowing they should say something but still too surprised.

The other teacher’s expressions mixed with shock and displeasure. “Really? Is this true, Seto?”

“Yes,” he said, without hesitation.

“Then I suppose you should come with us to the office. A call to your parents are in order. Mr. Keith, can you write up a report?”

“I’ll be more than happy to.”

As the group walked away, Seto spared a brief glance at Joey before facing forward and following the teachers as though they were escorting him to be crowning as King of the whole school rather than to be disciplined. Yugi couldn’t help but think just how like him that was.

The bell rang, scattering the last onlookers.

Joey and Yugi exchanged a look.

“Did moneybags just…defend me?” asked Joey.

Yugi, feeling a bit light headed from the drama, just closed her locker and gave her friend a ‘I told you so’ smile.

“See you in Biology?”

“Yeah,” Joey said faintly. “Yeah. Biology.”


	10. Secrets

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Yugi get's her song she's going to sing--in a fuzzy way.

Wednesday brought her afterschool voice lessons. Mondays, Wednesdays, and sometimes Fridays if Mr. Atem deemed it necessary. So far he hadn't.

Today he practically skipped to Yugi when she came into the choir room and dropped her backpack by the door.

"I found a song for you!"

He drew her to the piano out of excitement, and the title she saw on the music sheets he had looked very familiar, though she couldn't quite place the melody in her head. Before she could ask why he had picked such a modern song for her to just practice when he started to play, and she remembered.

_Secrets_ , by One Republic.

"Oh!" she said.

"I thought you'd recognize it," he said. "I saw it and instantly thought of you. You ready to tackle this today?"

She felt some apprehension, an unease that she thought she had already dealt with, but nodded. She had been able to sing to him before, hadn't she? She shouldn't be afraid now, of all times.

And yet, the further she went into warm ups, covering her face in embarrassment as she lip buzzed, memories from the day before in this same room started to crop up. Mr. Keith, the way she had fallen apart, how he had sat her down, how he had saved her from the wrestler then tended her wounds.

Something very strange was going on. Her chest started to burn, but no unpleasantly. It did, however, tighten her throat till it closed off completely and she became uncomprehensibly shy once more. He must think her so pathetic, so weak, like a little girl who always had to be saved.

And there was nothing she could do to change that.

He looked over when she failed to finish the scale and his fingers paused.

"You okay?"

She nodded, but couldn't respond. Even speaking stuck to her throat. This was different from ordinary nerves, and yet the result was the same. Her knees shook and her neck felt hot.

Mr. Atem frowned in concern.

"What are you afraid of?"

Everything. Him. Mr. Keith. Herself. Life.

…she really hated herself; this cowardly, tiny thing that couldn't help but freeze up just because she was embarrassed about being a damsel in distress and confused as to why she suddenly wanted to sit next to him and never move, yet run far away at the same time.

She swallowed hard. She couldn't be like this.

With a ball of effort, she gave him an easy smile.

"I'm okay. Just give me a minute to breathe and I'll be good to go."

He seemed relieved at that. As he waited for her to loosen up, he set up the pages of _Secrets_. He plucked the first few chords, nodded to himself, then looked back to her. She nodded, he told her when to start, then started to play. Yugi thought she was ready, thought she had remembered how to just open up her mouth, loosen her tongue, breathe…

But the only thing that came was the memory of hiding in the dark, waiting for Mr. Keith to find her.

She hadn't done anything that day to find the wrestler boy. She hadn't done anything to stand up for herself.

And now that she thought about it, she had done nothing to stand up for anyone either. Not even her best friend when she was being insulted and torn at by the same man.

Mr. Atem stopped playing, but she hardly paid attention to it. Her eyes were burning, her fists were clenched, and somewhere inside her there was a brick cell she built around her. Why was she even here? Why was she even bothering to learn how to sing? It wasn't like singing was ever going to change who she was as a person, cowardly, pathetic, useless to everyone.

When the music started up again, she started to dread that he was still waiting for her to sing. But then the unexpected happened.

Mr. Atem started to sing the song himself. He had a tenor and style like his uncle, but sweeter and smoother with youth. She hadn't had the chance to just listen to him, unfiltered by a dozen voices around him, either from the music fair or the choir. Nor had she probably ever heard him sing quite like this, like he meant it, like he was trying to reach the words.

" _I need another story  
Something to get off my chest  
My life gets kinda boring  
Need something that I can confess."_

Was he…singing to her? A small part of her cringed at such a modern song (she had always been more fond of music at least ten years her senior), but sung by him, she could forget. She could just…

The lyrics went on. Once or twice he stumbled, but pressed on as though he hadn't. When he reached the chorus he hit the first high note perfectly, giving her chills, and melting down whatever brick walls she had inside her. It was as though a hot syrup was being poured into her body, strengthening her and spreading feeling back into places she hadn't realized had been numb. Singing, just for her…so intimate.

But that's how music was. Intimacy. A language of the spirit alone.

_I love him_.

The thought startled her into a broken creak of song as her throat forcibly unstuck. But she picked up into the song, singing besides him, growing looser and looser by the minute. The warm ups were actually starting to kick in now.

" _So I'm gonna give all my secrets away_ ,"

Except this one. This older man with wild hair, sharp eyes, and a love for music. She could tell no one about this, and she wouldn't.

"Good!" Mr. Atem cried. "Almost to the end."

She finished the song feeling light headed, but unsure of the state of her heart. Euphoric? But, then, why did she still feel like crying her eyes out?

"I'm very pleased, it fits in perfectly with your voice. I think it will do just great."

"Great for what?" she asked.

"I'll let you know once I've gotten everything sorted out. Don't worry, it's nothing scary. I think you'll like it! Now, you good for one more go?"

"A-a-actually, I, um, think I need to head home early…if you don't mind. I-I have a huge project I sort of, uh, left to the side the other day." Half truth. It wasn't something she couldn't finish in the time she would have this evening.

But she couldn't stay here a second longer.

He gave her an odd, combing look that made the heat rise in her face and something akin to a shiver.

"Are you alright, Yugi?" He straightened and darkened. "That English teacher didn't try something else, did he?"

"No!" she said, a bit too quickly. She smiled. "No, he didn't do anything. Promise."

"Have you talked to anyone yet?"

"Was just going to do that. Talk to someone, that is. After lessons, uh, yeah."

He didn't look entirely convinced, but since he was fully aware of how little discomfort she could cope with, he sighed and tried not to look too disappointed as he gathered up the music sheets.

"Pity. I was hoping to hear you sing this song one more time. Do you need a ride home?"

Suddenly the idea of being in Mr. Atem's vanilla scented car sent thrills of horror through her. At the same time, her stomach jumped like a butterfly. She should say yes, then she could talk to him, be with him—

Was she stupid?

"Thank you, b-but I'll be alright."

"Oh, one last question. Would you be okay if I played that recording of your singing to some colleagues of mine?"

She was too distracted to really feel nervous about something so minor. "Sure."

He seemed quite pleased at this.

And though she had hoped she would happen to spot the wrestler boy with the pompadour on her way past the gym, he didn't step out, nor did she have the courage to step in and look for him.

Thus, she simply went home, wishing she could wash herself down the drain.

Because nothing good ever came out of falling in love with a teacher.

**Author's Note:**

> I update at least once a week on Wednesday, so stay tuned! You can trust me to finish my stories as well!


End file.
